Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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