I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Randomize