Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Let's get the cat blown out
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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