It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Randomize
