no you cant smoke seaweed
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Two words: blizzard sex
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize