Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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