Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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