she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
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He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
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I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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