sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
