Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
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I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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