Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
