nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
