i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
