I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Floor bacon is actually really good
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
