I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
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Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
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Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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