We won't sleep together?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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