there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize