I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
