apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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