Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
