Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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