Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
