The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize