"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Actions speak louder than pants.
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I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
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You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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