if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
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Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
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I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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