she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
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