There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
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