I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
