matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
