Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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