I'd wear matching sweaters with you
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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