do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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