i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
