after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
