Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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