i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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