girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
