i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
