Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
