i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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