Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
