He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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