Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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