There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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