i think my mom watched the whole time
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
