i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize