No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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