I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
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