Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
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Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
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And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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