my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
