WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
